The bible actually tells us that God commands Christians to Love: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, 'You shall love your neighbour as yourself." (Matthew 22:37-39).  God is first, and other people are second. That order can sometimes lead Christians to justify unloving behaviour towards others, but a Christian cannot profess to love God without actually loving others. With that said, love does not mean accepting a person's actions (see below, "love does not rejoice in unrighteousness"). 

The bible gives a beautiful description of what love is: "Love is patient, love is kind, it is not jealous; love does not brag, it is not arrogant. It does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of wrong suffered, it does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; it keeps every confidence, it believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails". (1 Corinthians 13:4-8). We can all use this verse to assess our own actions and determine if they are loving or not. 

Too often those who profess to be Christians are also the ones who say one thing but do another behind closed doors. These people judge and point out flaws in others, but do the same things. The bible actually tells us that God hates hypocrites. To those 'holier-than-thou' people, Jesus says: "you are like whitewashed tombs which on the outside appear beautiful, but inside they are full of dead men's bones and all uncleanness. So you too, outwardly appear righteous to people, but inwardly you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness." (Matthew 23:27-28). 

Christians aren't perfect, but Jesus actually says, "he who is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone" (John 8:7). This means that we aren't supposed to judge other people (throw stones). Instead, God calls us to recognize that we are all flawed, we all make mistakes, and we all have wrong motives from time to time. 

Jesus tells us that every action is rooted in a motive of the heart: anger, lust, love, joy, etc. And while we may not do the exact same thing as other people, the motives of our hearts are all the same. For this reason, we should not judge others. God says that when we do, we are actually casting judgment on ourselves: "you foolish person, everyone of you who passes judgment; for in that matter in which you judge someone else, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things." (Romans 2:1). 

No, true Christianity is actually not about rules at all. Let me explain in 5 parts:

• First, the most important thing to understand is this: God is God, and we are not. Next, we must understand that humanity's ultimate desire is to be our own ruler, our own God. We think we're capable, qualified, and deserving, but we're not. Every one of us is immensely flawed; we are greedy, lustful, envious, and selfish (at least from time to time). Look around. The world is full of hurt and pain. Why? Because the motives of our heart cause it - they cause damage, death, and destruction. The motives of our heart make us unfit to be God. So, God is God, and we are not. 

• Second, God desires us; He loves us and wants to spend eternity with us in perfect harmony and love, and without pain, tears, or suffering. The only way to ensure eternity is without pain, tears, or suffering is to eliminate the imperfections - the wrong heart motives we all have - that cause it.

• Third, the bible is typically divided into two sections. We call the sections the "First Testament" and the "Second Testament". A 'testament' is an agreement (or a promise to do something). In Law, we know that term in reference to a person's 'Last Testament' or 'Will' (a promise to do something upon death). You can also think of the two sections as: Teaching and Doing.

• Fourth, the First Testament contains God's original promise (more on that below) and all the rules (in that order). The rules are made up of the ten commandments and 600+(!!) other rules (also known as the "law"). In giving humanity these rules, God was essentially saying, "If you can follow the law perfectly, you will have proved that you do not have any imperfections. But we're all flawed, and human nature is such that rules drive us to break them: "Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God's sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin." (Romans 3:20).

• Fifth, the Second Testament is God's fulfillment of the original promise to do for us what we could not do ourselves: earn righteousness (remove the imperfections). He fulfilled this promise by entering into this world (Jesus), living a sinless (blameless, flawless, perfect) life, dying a criminal's death (taking the punishment for our wrongdoing), and overcoming death. Now, instead of trying to earn our own righteousness (which we could never do), we just need to believe that Jesus (God) earned it for us. Two things happen when we believe:

First, we return to the point above (the most important thing to understand): God is God, and we are not. We are not perfect, but we can trust the Creator of the Universe, a perfect God without blemish who loves us unconditionally. 

Second, God imputes His righteousness to us (his perfection). We call this "grace" (an unearned gift): "...being justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus..." (Romans 3:24).

Righteousness is perfect love (God). Sin is anything that contradicts God. 

We tend to think of sin in terms of the 'big' stuff: murder, adultery, etc., but Jesus tells us that sin actually goes much deeper. In Matthew 5, He says,

• "You have heard it said, 'You shall not murder' ... but I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment."

• "You have heard it said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

• "You have heard it said, 'Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemy and pray for those who persecute you". 

Jesus is explaining that our understanding of sin falls woefully short. He's saying that, yes, murder and adultery are sins, but so are holding a grudge (unforgiveness), lust, and hatred. Jesus is saying that sin is not the outward action, but the inner workings of our hearts. 

The Bible tells us that sin and righteousness cannot coexist: "For what do righteousness and lawlessness share together, or what does light have in common with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14). Righteousness and sin are complete opposites. 

God is righteous, and we, because of the wrong motives we all have from time to time, are unrighteous (lawless/darkness). We are therefore all separated from God; we can't coexist with Him.  

So how do we fix it? We don't. We can't. 

God created us knowing that we would fall short in this way; that we would never obtain righteousness on our own. But God never intended to leave us in our unrighteousness. He promised to rescue us, to forgive our wrongdoings, and to remember our sins no more (Hebrews 8:12). God fulfilled His promise by sending Himself (Jesus) to take the penalty for our wrongdoing.  Now, instead of relying on our own deeds, we rely on Jesus. We give Him control of our life, and when we do, God imputes His own righteousness to us. "God made Him (Jesus) who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God." 2 Corinthians 5:21. 

It can be both easy and difficult to understand. 

1. God wants us to experience righteousness and to coexist with Him for eternity (to experience perfect love). He loves us! 

2. We are incapable of obtaining righteousness on our own because we all have motives that fall short from time to time. 

3. God makes a way and does it for us because He wants us to experience true, perfect love, and the only way to experience that is to know Him - to know that He is God and we are not. 

It might not all make sense to you right now. That's okay. If you're tired, burdened, and worn out, and you ask God to take over, He'll show you what this all means. He'll make all the wrongs right, change the inner workings of your heart, and you will experience perfect love.